How to Stay In Touch With Friends & Family On Your Gap Year

by Megan Lee

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The thought of being away from home is one of the hardest challenges to surmount prior to a gap year – and that’s even before you go! The physical distance between you and home can be a tough pill to swallow while you’re actually abroad. Keeping in touch with loved ones is a surefire means to soften these blows. However, while important, communication can also become unhealthy. It can detract from your presence on your gap year, make you feel unnecessary amounts of FOMO or homesickness, and it can actually lead you to question why you even did a gap year in the first place.

This frame of mind is not ideal for anyone, let alone a student on their gap year.

Here are some tips to help you stay mindful when keeping in touch with family and friends, including communication strategies that work.

Talk About It Before You Go

Explain any concerns you have about communication with your closest friends and family. It can be hard to look your Mom in the eye and break the news that you won’t want to talk to her every day, but it is important that both parties lay out all of their communication-concerns from the beginning. Having this underlying understanding of each other’s needs will provide fodder for healthier communication in the coming months.

Leave Your Smartphone Behind

Yeah, we said it!

Your best bet for maximizing your presence in a foreign destination is to not bring your smart device altogether. There are still ways to communicate, such as using your laptop or computer labs in foreign countries. Not having it around to tempt you will free your mind from its tether and allow you to be fully present in your international experiences.

Can’t Part? Set Ground Rules For Yourself

If the idea of leaving your precious smartphone in its box for a few months is just too much to bear, decide (with conviction) to be more conscious towards your smartphone use. If you are bringing it to use primarily as a communication tool, keep it put away unless you’re calling your family.

Don’t convince yourself that you will only use it for phone calls if you secretly know you’re hoping to blow up your Instagram feed with dozens of new pictures each week.

Aim For Quality Over Quantity

Cozying up for a good conversation with a loved one is one of life’s sweetest pleasures. Use your gap year as a time to reconnect with that reality. Instead of having ongoing text message conversations with friends and family, decide to set aside time each week for a proper catch-up. This can be a phone call, a Skype date, an email, or simply a longer-than-normal message on WhatsApp or Facebook messenger. Put thought and intention into sharing your stories. Connect the dots of your experience before blabbing a play-by-play to anyone who’ll listen.

This strategy will not only allow you to be more fully present in your gap year destination, but it will also allow you a stronger presence in your communication relationships, too.

Go With The Flow

Some weeks you might need to chat with family or friends more than other weeks. This might be because you’re feeling particularly down, you are struggling with homesickness, or you are physically able (or unable) to have the privacy necessary to catch-up. Don’t be alarmed by the inconsistencies of your communication, but don’t be surprised if it bums out your family and friends, too. It’s important you explain to your loved ones the reality of your situation and schedule, while also fully-trying to be there for them as they are there for you. Travel can be whack and mess up any sort of plan, so it is important that Gap Year students are extra-appreciative of their loved ones’ flexibility.

Remember The Time Before Smartphones

Okay, you probably don’t. But keep in mind that there were plenty of travelers and Gap Year takers that survived their journeys without pocket internet (and we’re not talking about ancient explorers).

Our sometimes-neurotic attachments to communication with others can truly be a hindrance to studying or volunteering in a foreign country. It can be all-too-tempting to hole away in your room for an ooVoo call rather than staying up and chatting with your homestay brother or your new friends. Keep in mind that while communication can be a healthy and normal behavior, it can also quickly become dependent and negative.

Be conscious of how much you feel the need to speak with others back home before leaning on those who are in your immediate vicinity.

Look around you. You’re in a fascinating place, surrounded by good-hearted people, and having an experience that many would kill for. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity, and we’d hate for it to be squandered because you’re addicted to telling your BFF’s every single detail from your day. Strive to use technology as a helpful tool and not a crutch, and you’re sure to avoid sacrificing your Gap Year experience for more thumb fluttering on your touch screen.

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